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5 ways to digitally disconnect and increase present moment awareness

2/23/2017

In this highly connected digital world, it’s easy to get lost looking at our smartphones and losing contact with the people right in front of us (or even the streets around us if we’re walking!).

The blessing of technology is its 24/7 access. And the curse of technology is its 24/7 access.

At one of my recent Visioning Your Best 2017 workshops, one participant commented how grateful he felt to take the time to be still. And one of my clients shared that she was looking for ways to be present.

How about you? Are you feeling the need for more spaciousness in your life?

One of the pathways to creating more present-minded focus in your life is to dial down your digital connection.

I use the words “dial down” because I’m not advocating for you to get rid of your smartphone. The task at hand is to consciously invite more moments of present-moment awareness without distractions constantly bombarding you.

When you dial down your digital connection, you allow space to dial up your moments of present awareness.

In this light, here are 5 ways I’d like to offer you to experiment with dialing down your digital connection.

Turn off your smartphone and computer notifications.
If you’re like many people, you have notification alerts that come on your phone and computer. From social media like Facebook or Twitter, to breaking news sources, to incoming emails, your phone and computer are vying for your attention. “Look at me!” it says. “Give me attention!” You can turn off your notifications so that you don’t stop what you’re doing and automatically pick up your phone every couple minutes. This gives you the power to decide when you want to look at social media, or news, or your email. And if turning off all your notifications is too much, pick one or two and notice how that changes how you experience your day.
When you’re eating, turn off the tv and leave the computer, tablets and smartphones off the dining table.
In my pre-diabetes support group, I learned that eating while watching tv or looking at your phone can cause “mindless eating,” which can lead to eating past the point of being full. Rather than eating mindlessly, conscious eating allows you to notice not only what you’re eating, with all the tastes and smells, but also how you’re eating. If you’re eating with a group of people, you can also try this practice called “phone stacking” where you collect everyone’s smartphones and stack them all so that no one is tempted to sneak a peek. All this gives you the opportunity to enjoy your food and each other’s company.
Charge your phones and tablets outside the bedroom.
If you’re looking for ways to have a more sound and blissful sleep, you can charge your phones and tablets away from the bed and in another room. If you check social media or read the news before bedtime, you can do this all outside the bedroom before you turn in. And if you use your phone as your alarm clock, you can still set it and have it away from your bed. That way you’ll be forced to get up and turn it off.
Check email only at certain designated times of the day.
One of the biggest work distractions is checking your email constantly. One productivity strategy is to check your email at “batched” times, meaning you look at your emails in certain batches. You can check your email mid-morning and mid-afternoon, and all other times you can close your email programs. If you have time-sensitivities, you can always ask certain people to text if important. Again, the practice is letting you be in charge of your emails rather than having your emails in charge of you.
Choose something fun to do…without your smartphone!
Is there something fun that you enjoy doing, perhaps something you haven’t done for a while? Maybe you like taking a hike, or walking through the neighborhood, or grabbing a cup of coffee. One tip is to choose something fun to do, and to leave your smartphone at home. If you have to bring it with you, in case of emergencies, you can always put it in airplane mode or turn it off. See if you can enjoy the activity and be present to it, in all its fullness and not through the camera lens.

Now that you have these different options, what’s next? This leads me to your coaching assignment for the week:

Look at the list of ways to dial down your digital connection. See if you’d like to experiment with one of them, or come up with your own way to digitally disconnect.
With the one you choose, try it out for three days in a row.
Write back to me or leave a comment on the blog below to let us know how the experience was for you. Accountability and group sharing are keys to creating new habits.
Then, experiment with another way to digitally disconnect for another three days and see how that works.

For extra bonus points, invite a friend to do this with you and check in with each other to see how it goes.

Again, the point of this exercise isn’t to cut you off completely from digital connections.

The real point is to give you greater power to choose the kinds of experiences you want to have.

Rather than passively saying yes to obtrusive distractions that take you away from the present moment, you have the power to consciously say yes to cultivating more moments of spaciousness in your everyday life.

I’d love to hear what other ways you have to digitally disconnect, or how this experiment works for you. Share with others, let’s create a learning community and leave a comment below.

Note: If you’re feeling the need for support in creating a life filled with more spaciousness, purpose and joy, I offer a 20 minute complimentary assessment that may provide you with the insight and resources you need in this moment. To learn more about this, click here.

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Are weeds taking up space in your mind's garden?

2/15/2017

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If your mind were a garden, what kind of plants would you find there?

Did you deliberately plant certain types of seeds that are now growing? Would you be surprised by wayward weeds that may be running rampant?

Does your mind’s garden feel serene? Does it feel a little chaotic and un-manicured? Maybe a little bit of both?

When I work one-on-one with clients and teach my classes, I love using the metaphor of a garden as a way to illustrate how your mind works.

With my beginning clients and students, many are surprised when we start to look at what’s planted in the mind’s garden.

Sometimes you have plants growing fully and magnificently that you enjoy. These represent the aspects of life where you feel fulfilled.

For example, you can have a rose garden representing your romantic life and you feel that everything is in full bloom. Yes, there are thorns, and yet we focus on the fullness of the plant itself.

Other times you might find some weeds that take up a lot of space. The weeds represent the aspects of life that you didn’t intend to grow, but for some reason they’re there.

Weeds can show up as you being in a job that you hate, or the weeds can be the unhealthy eating habits you have trouble shaking.

Weeds are those habits, behaviors and ways of being that don’t serve the highest vision you hold for yourself.

Here’s the beauty, though. The garden of your mind is your garden to care for. It’s all yours!

You get to decide what kind of garden you want.

If you want to get rid of those weeds, you can. If you want to plant healthy-affirming seeds, you can. If you want to create more space in your garden, you can.

You are the gardener in your mind’s garden. You are the gardener of your life.

So here’s your coaching assignment for the week:

Imagine your mind as the garden of your life. Take stock of the different areas of life as different aspects of your garden: your health, work, relationships, health, personal growth, spirituality, fun and recreation, physical environment, self-care and others.
As you scan the garden, do you spot the areas that bring you joy and fullness? Can you spot any weeds?
With as little judgment as possible, bless the garden as it is, including the weeds. The garden has been your life in the making and it has brought you to this exact point.
Now, begin to envision what changes, if any, you’d like to make to your garden. Spend some time musing the possibilities of what types of seeds you’d like to plant.

As you begin to envision the possibilities of what could replace the weeds, you start to loosen the dirt around the weeds. That’s when you know that you are digging in.

You have the ability to actively create the garden of your dreams.

I’d love to hear what you think about this metaphor of your mind as a garden, and what kind of garden you see in your life. Please leave a comment below.

Abundant Blessings and Namaste.

Special Notes: If you’re feeling the need for support, I offer a complimentary life coaching consultation by phone, Skype or in-person. Read more about that by clicking here.

And, I’m in the final stages of giving my Los Angeles workshop tour of Visioning Your Best 2017. If you’d like to check out upcoming dates or sign up for the free webinar, click here to learn more.

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Pain pushes until the vision pulls you

2/3/2017

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One of my favorite spiritual life quotes comes from Michael Beckwith, founder of the Agape International Spiritual Center in Los Angeles. He says:

“Pain pushes until the vision pulls.”

In my work, I talk with people who are experiencing pain…pain in an unfulfilling job, in a struggle to pay the bills, in a yearning for a loving relationship, in a disconnect with their physical body, or in a foggy cloud of not knowing what to do.

I appreciate Michael’s quote because he offers that the pain you may be experiencing in life actually serves a purpose.

The purpose of pain is to push you into a greater, more expansive possibility for your life.

Sometimes pain starts off as a small feeling of discontent. A person is at their job for many years, seemingly coasting along, and one day something doesn’t feel quite right. Nothing on the outside may have changed, but inside there’s an inkling of a feeling for something more.

When left on its own without any care or attendance, the discontent grows. Sometimes it shows up as becoming sick more frequently. Other times it shows up as arguments with loved ones. And it could show up as numbing yourself with alcohol or drugs.

The pain signals that there is something within you that is wanting to express itself.

There’s a world of possibility that is inviting you to step into it. And the pain is leading you right into it.

That world of possibility is your vision.

When you start to entertain a greater vision of your life, the pain starts to ease. The pain that had been pushing you all along begins to give way to the vision that is now pulling you forward.

For your coaching assignment for this week, I invite you to ask yourself these questions:

Where in your life are you feeling discontent? Where are you feeling pain? Without any judgment, acknowledge it and recognize that it is giving you a message.
Now ask, what greater possibility is unfolding from this discontent? What is the pain pushing you to look at and to recognize as a more vibrant potential in your own life?
When you feel the flicker of this emerging vision inside you, see if there is one small step that you can take to explore what that vision can look like in your life.

Taking that one step is your vision pulling towards a greater expression of you.

I’d love to hear how this post resonates with you. Are you feeling the pushing of pain, or the pulling of your vision? Please leave a comment below.

Abundant Blessings and Namaste.

Special Notes: If you’re feeling the need for support, I offer a complimentary life coaching consultation by phone, Skype or in-person. Read more about that by clicking here.

And if you’re in the Los Angeles area, I’ll be doing a few in-person workshops on Visioning Your Best 2017, in collaboration with WeWork. The workshops are free and lunch is provided. Here's the schedule:

Santa Monica Promenade – Tues, Feb 7, 12-1pm
Long Beach – Wed, Feb 8, 12:30pm-1:30pm
Hollywood – Tues, Feb 14, 12:30-1:30pm
Downtown Los Angeles / Fine Arts Building, Wed, Feb 15, 12-1pm
La Brea & Santa Monica Blvd – Thurs, Feb 16, 12-1pm

Email me if you’re interested in attending.

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abundant good blog

5 ways to digitally disconnect and increase present moment awareness

Are weeds taking up space in your mind's garden?

Pain pushes until the vision pulls you

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