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Be mindful who you share your dreams with

3/30/2017

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A friend of mine called me the other day full of excitement.
 
“I just got this great idea! It’s about _____________. But the thing is, I’m not sure it could work.”
 
“Why aren’t you sure it could work?” I asked her.
 
“Well…” She paused, now seeming a bit tentative. “I told another friend about it and he asked me why I would want to do something so risky. I’m excited about this project but now I’m not so sure it’s the right thing for me to do.”
 
In that moment my heart broke for her. You see, I’ve heard this same situation come up many times with my clients.
 
Maybe you’ve experienced this scenario yourself.

Here's the scene: You have this idea to try something new. Maybe it’s a new business venture. Perhaps it’s an impulse to travel to some place faraway all by yourself. Or possibly you have the urge to explore making a change to your career.
 
Then, with all your excitement, you start sharing the idea with others before you have the chance to let it fully digest with you.
 
And the not-so-helpful comments from others are what start to shake you.
 
  • “Why would you do that? That’s not who you are”
  • “Gosh, that sounds like a big risk. Are you sure you can handle that?”
  • “Oh, I’ve heard of that. Someone’s already done it. You’re not doing anything new.”
 
In many cases, those comments seep into your own consciousness. Self-doubt start to creep in. Even worse, some of those comments from others all of a sudden became comments you tell yourself.
 
What happens to the dream and the excitement?

For a lot of people, if you let the unhelpful comments get to you, you put your dreams on the back burner. Months and years go by. Then that dream comes back to visit you every once in a while. And you look back with regret and ask, “What if I had done that? Where would I be today?”
 
Your dreams are precious.

In my client sessions, many people share with me what’s on their hearts. Sometimes what they share is the first time they've said it out loud. I take everything they say to me and hold it with absolute care and sacredness.
 
And here’s what I tell them:
 
“Be mindful who you share your new vision with," I offer. "Your new vision is like a new baby."

Like a baby, your vision isn’t always fully formed. Care and nurturing are needed before you share your new-born vision with the world.
 
Most people wouldn’t expose their newborn to the cold and the wind. You first need to give your baby vision some time to grow.
 
And if you want to share your vision with someone, imagine that it’s like having someone hold and care for a baby.

Only allow those people you trust and who support you to be with your vision, and make sure to tell them you don’t want to hear anything at this point that would make you start to doubt your dreams.
 
With all this in mind, here is how you can take this week's teaching into your coaching assignment for the week:
 
  • Do you have an idea that excites you that is starting to bubble up in your mind and in your heart?

    Example: I’ve had this idea to explore a new career. Even though I’ve been successful in my industry for the past 15 years, it doesn’t feel as satisfying as it once did. I’d really like to try something new, something totally different than what I’ve done in the past.
​
  • What can you do to nurture this idea with love and care?

    Example: For now I’d like to keep it close to my heart. I’d like to journal a bit about what’s coming up for me and what kinds of new work I’d like to explore.


  • Can you think of who you would trust so much that they would care for your vision as if it were their own? Are there people you know you wouldn’t talk to about this at this point?

    Example: I have one friend I completely trust. I know that when I talk with her, I first need to tell her this dream is new and I only want to hear supportive comments. I want to make sure I care for this dream. And yes, there definitely are people I would not share this with.
 
All these questions are ways to bring you greater awareness and support to your heart’s dreams. Like a newborn baby, your dreams, and you, deserve all the care and loving in the world. Give your emerging vision time to grow.
 
And it’s okay to give yourself permission to be discerning of who you share your dreams with. Claim your heart as a safe haven, a sacred and loving environment, for your dreams to unfold.
 
Affirmation: I give time, space and love for my new dreams to grow.
​

I’d love to hear how today’s post landed with you, and if you had any a-ha’s or insights. Please leave a comment below.


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Special Note: I’ll be leading my Vision Board workshop in downtown Los Angeles on Saturday, April 22. Limited seating is available and early bird specials apply. Plus, the first 3 registrants get a special bonus. If you’d like to register before I announce this more widely, you can click here:
​
https://www.eventbrite.com/e/create-energize-your-vision-board-workshop-tickets-32936585213


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How to handle worry

3/24/2017

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One of my clients recently came to our coaching session with a number of worries on her mind. You may have even experienced one of these worries at one or more times in your life:
 
  • Worry about not making enough money
  • Worry about a conversation she knew she needed to have with a loved one
  • Worry about not being able to stop certain unhealthy eating habits
  • Worry that she would be stuck in her job forever.
 
With all these worries, she was so stressed, and she didn’t know what to do.
 
Rather than delving deep into each of these stressors she was feeling, I suggested we take a step back and look at the nature of worry.
 
One of the most popular quotes attributed to Mark Twain addresses worry head on.
 
Twain says, “I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.”
 
Funny, right? How could someone have troubles, but most of them never happened?
 
The answer is that many of the troubles people experience are mostly playing out in their minds.
 
You see, life is full of possibilities, both positive and negative. And you get to choose where to put your focus.
 
Depending on which end of the spectrum of possibilities you focus, you can feel inspired or you can feel defeated.
 
Worry focuses your attention on the worst side of possibilities. In other words, if something can go wrong, worry incessantly whispers in your ear, letting you think that it probably will go wrong.
 
And where worry goes, so does stress and anxious energy.
 
So what do you do if you find yourself worrying about something?
 
With my client, I asked her, “If you could experience this situation in the way that you’d ideally like to have it, what would happen?”
 
The question jarred her. “You mean there’s another way to look at this?” she asked me incredulously.
 
And so we looked at each situation to uncover other possibilities.
 
Instead of worry that her conversation with her loved one would go horribly, she imagined a conversation that was free flowing where each person felt deeply understood.
 
Instead of worry that she wouldn’t make enough money, she opened to the idea that she could bring in another stream of income. And that sparked in her a couple ideas of ways she could make extra money.
 
The more we explored possibilities that were positive, her face lit up and she felt more expansive.
 
She realized that she had unconsciously focused on the worst that might happen, which led her to feeling powerless.
 
Now, she recognized that she had the power to imagine a more spacious, uplifting possibility. In that expanded energy, the ideas came to her easily for what she could do to shift each of these situations.
 
This is not to say that all situations will end up as the ideal you imagine. What I am saying is that you get to choose the kind of energy you’d like to embody in the process.
 
Here is a spiritual truth: Energy is both creative and attractive. What is your energy creating, and what is your energy attracting?
 
If you’d like, you can apply this lesson in your own life with this week’s coaching assignment:
 
  • Is there an area in your life where you might be carrying a worry?
    Example: I'm worried that I'll never find my soulmate.


  • As you think about this worry, see if you can look at it objectively. Is the worry focused on a negative possibility of what might happen?
    Example: Now that I look at it, never is a long time. It does seem a little pessimistic to think that I'll never find someone.


  • Now, if you can imagine a positive outcome for this situation, what might that look like?
    Example: Well, I don't know if I'll find my soulmate, but I realize that thinking I won't has stopped me from even putting myself out there. I guess a positive outcome is finding someone I can enjoy spending time with. That seems better.
 
At the heart of this exercise is the recognition that you have the power to choose where you focus your thoughts and your energy.
 
As the spiritual saying illuminates, “Energy flows where attention goes.”
 
In other words, if the energy isn’t flowing for you, you can begin to change its course by simply shifting your attention.
 
Affirmation: Today I choose to give my attention and energy to the highest possibility, for my life and for the betterment of the world.
 
I’d love to hear how today’s post landed with you, and if you had any a-ha’s or insights. Please leave a comment below.


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Special Note: I’ll be leading my Vision Board workshop in downtown Los Angeles on Saturday, April 22. Limited seating is available and early bird specials apply. Plus, the first 3 registrants get a special bonus. If you’d like to register before I announce this more widely, you can click here:
​
https://www.eventbrite.com/e/create-energize-your-vision-board-workshop-tickets-32936585213


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Your Fortune begins with you

3/10/2017

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At a recent networking event, I spoke to a woman who runs a holistic wellness practice. I asked her how business fared for her these days.
 
“To be honest,” she opened up to me, “my business has really slowed down. After the elections, my clients are withdrawing and not wanting to care for themselves. They’re holding on to their money and don’t want to spend their resources. I hope it’ll pick up soon.”
 
You might be able to relate, not necessarily to her particular situation but to its own way expressing in your own life.
 
Like her, you may want to experience something but it’s not happening because there seems to be something out of your control in the way.
 
  • You want a new client but people aren’t spending money on your services.
  • You want to do your job in a way that you know works, but your boss keeps on getting in your way.
  • You want a romantic relationship but the people you keep meeting are duds.
  • You want to lose weight but your co-workers keep on bringing in donuts and pastries to the office.
  • You have an idea for a business, but no one has done this before so you think it won’t work.
 
In these instances, it’s easy to look at what’s happening and throw your hands up in the air and say, “It is what it is. It’s out of my control.”
 
However, this way of looking at life gives away your power and your potential for happiness to outside forces and conditions. When living from this mindset, you wait for someone else to act.
 
The truth is: You have the power to live the way you want, with the joy and freedom that your heart wants to experience. And you can start NOW.
 
Eric Butterworth states this concept beautifully, in his book Spiritual Economics:
 
“Your Fortune begins with you.”
 
In other words, your fortune doesn’t begin with anyone else but you.
 
We live in a Universe full of possibility, where creation is happening all the time. The creative energy that created and is creating our stars and our galaxies is the same creative energy that resides within you.
 
You have within you all you need to begin experiencing a life of wonder and joy.
 
And when you embrace this belief, the Universe responds in kind and brings you the resources, situations, people and experiences that are in alignment with your highest good.
 
If you are willing to see how this can work in your life, here is your coaching assignment for the week:
 
  • What is one thing you’d like to experience in your life? In other words, what is your Fortune?
  • If you believed the idea that your Fortune begins with you, what are some ways that you can move closer to experiencing this one thing? List out a few different ways, wording them as concrete actions.
  • Looking at your list, see if there’s one that speaks to your heart and brings you excitement.
  • Now choose that one and commit to doing it.
 
And here’s a tip on how you can support yourself to nurture this positive mindset:

Create an affirmation to say to yourself that helps you to remember this Truth.

Here’s an affirmation that you can use:
 
  • My Fortune begins with me. I have within me all I need to experience a life of wonder and joy.
 
I’d love to hear how today’s blog post resonates with you. Please visit my blog and leave a comment below.


A couple notes: If you live in the Los Angeles area, I’ll be giving the Sunday Power Talk at the Global Truth Center in Studio City this coming Sunday, March 12, 2017. Meditation is at 4:30pm and the service begins at 5pm. Click here for more info.
 
And if you’re in a place in your life where you’d like to make some shifts when it comes to your career, money, spirituality or life in general, feel check out the different programs and services I offer. Click here for more info.

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    About Joselito

    Joselito is a spiritual life coach helping people create a purposeful, spiritual path to career and financial freedom.


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